You MIGHT be a Redneck if...

[Coltonis]

You MIGHT be a Redneck if...

...The driver seat of your 1970 Oldsmobile Cutlass is a LAWN CHAIR!





LOL... thought that would make for a good first post...

So... my story:

It all started Junior year of high school. Didn't have my license yet and my sister who had been driving me to school graduated the year before, so while everyone I knew was already driving I had to walk to school. "Dump-dum-duuuuh"... Every day I would take the same route and every day I would walk past the same car. Didn't even know what kind of car it was since there were no brand emblems on the car. All I knew was it was big, and black, and mean looking, and it had the numbers 4-4-2 front and center. It didn't take me long to find out what that car was all about. Up till then, Mustangs had been my fantasy car of choice. (Loved Gone-in-60 Seconds.) Maybe it was the fact that the prissy mourmon cheerleader, who's daddy bought her a cherry red mustang for her 16th birthday, had one already... or the couple of other guys in my class that managed to find a beater mustang to work on before I could even drive, had theirs already... either way my devotions had changed... Nobody at school ever had a 442. (Including me )

So my search began, throughout my search anyone who had an actual 442 had either already restored it (too rich for my blood), or had attempted to restore it and ended up opting to sell the "pieces" for as much as it "could be worth, someday". It took me two years out of high school before I found a car I could afford. Well not a true 442, it was a cutlass with a 455, but beggars can't be choosers.

When I went to pick it up the guy I bought it from claimed he had gotten it to run. Upon my arrival it failed to display that talent. (No matter how much gasoline he poured into the float bowl). I took it anyways. Paid $3,000 cash for it. Probably paid too much, but we live and we learn, right? Towed it all the way back from Cottonwood, AZ to home sweet home. (Anyone not familiar with Cottonwood, its one of those places you drive "through" not "to".)

There is no feeling quite like towing home your new car

With my automotive "dragon" safely tucked away and sleeping in its new "lair" I began poking and prodding at it, trying to get it to "wake up" and "come play with me." I found some new friends (you guys! ) and learned how to rebuild a quadrajet in the process... blindfolded, behind my back, underwater... Then one day, "VROOOOM" It was alive! Then suddenly it wasn't... After some more massaging and trial and error I found what I can only describe as "black-gummy-worms-of-death" living in my engine heads oil returns. My guess is the entire oil system is "infected" with the "gummies". Fearing I might melt/weld/damage something permanently... I resolved to tear down and build anew. I have spent quite awhile locating various tools, parts, and procedures that I might need just to get started. And my Cutlass has sat in my driveway not moving, not running, all the while.

Them sentimental types say "its the journey thats important, not the destination." So I thought I should bring everyone along with me on my journey!

(I'll post some more pics soon, I have a bit of a queue saved up.)

[a64olz]

Hey!!! I resemble that remark. I have used wheels, a paint bucket and a fishing boat seat, you should shorten the legs on the chair, that would be sweet cruising down Shea Blvd or maybe even pull into Firerock and have the valet park it.

[Jamesbo]

It's whole lot nicer than the upside down 5 gallon drywall mud can I used once [or twice]

[dhoff]

I have found that a milkcrate with a piece of foam on it works good, unless you try to push the brake, gas, turn, ect... The main thing is to not give up your restoration, you will have to walk away for awhile sometimes. I took four years to redo a 1971 chevelle, and am on my second year on the 1971 cutlass. If it isn,t a time issue then it is always the money issue. Dave

[Lady72nRob71]

Lightweight and functional - perfect for racing!
I had used a couple fertilizer bags stacked up when i had my seats out over the winter. They were heavy though and negatively affected my ET's... No back support, too.

Nice story! I hope you get her up and running very soon!

[citcapp]

As the saying goes gotta start somewere and it might as well be here. Good luck with your build. PS the webbing color on the chair is wrong for the red car major clash I advise a dye job

[Coltonis]

More Pictures! I really wish I could find the pictures from the original craigslist posting. Back when I went to look at the car the first time, but I wasn't thinking about saving them so they are prolly gone forever. It was before the guy I bought it from had tried to spruce it up in order to sell. At any rate I went out and got a good set of baseline photos before I start tearing crap out. That I way I will have plenty to compare my progress to and an exit strategy should I forget how it all went together originally.






The trunk does close, there is just no lock cylinder, somebody opened it with their crow-bar shaped "key"... now it requires a screw driver shaped "key".



Just *a bit* dusty..


If you think my car got beat up, you should see the other guy...





Lucky for me my car only needs one tooth... (err - I apologize for that joke.)

You can see in this pic the strokes from the rattle can job it got right before it sold



Good to see nothing lurking in "The Pit"

Its not all sunshine and lollie-pops though... the back end looks like it got tagged and repaired, crappily...


Just a hint of cancer on driver side

The inside looks to be clean, though its hard to tell with the road coat

Passenger Side not so lucky...


This front fender brace is not all that secure either

This side however is QUITE secure

I'm fairly certain that is 1000-mile-an-hour wire they used here

And for those with a discerning ear, wondering if it was loud enough - you can rest at ease... thats right Glasspacks!... oooh and it looks like somebody learned how to weld at the same time ...Yay!


The trunk worries me but its too tough to tell atm

Once i get everything gutted and powerwashed I'll know if its terminal

I got more on the way and some actual progress pics that are still on my camera, but thats a sufficiently long post for now, me thinks

[csstrux]

[ent72olds]

Not to rain on your parade my friend, but keep your head up! Once you tear into that beast, the demons will arise...then you'll wonder what you got yourself into...

[marcar1993]

I had a lawn chair in my cutlass too when I had the interior out.

[dhoff]

You probably are thinking you have a nasty job ahead, but if you had a car in that shape to start with in Pennsylvania, you would be very lucky! That little bit of rust is not bad! Have fun with the project.

[Yellowstatue]

That's not dust! It is a very expensive protective coating While you are at it, the mirrors seem to be the wrong year I have seen lawn chairs at the beach that have very short legs, keeps your hair-do intact!!

[Lady72nRob71]

Originally Posted by marcar1993

I had a lawn chair in my cutlass too when I had the interior out.

Wow - that hot pink really goes with the grey interior!
That brings back memories of the hot pink (and green and yellow) seat covers (and other stuff) back in the late 80's!

[Jamesbo]

[HTMLThe trunk worries me but its too tough to tell atm
] [/html]

That's the tricky part where the rear quarter attaches to the bottom of the trunk.

[Coltonis]

Originally Posted by Yellowstatue

That's not dust! It is a very expensive protective coating While you are at it, the mirrors seem to be the wrong year

If that coating is expensive, my back yard is worth millions

Good eye man, I asked about the mirrors not too long ago on here, I was worried they were just some no name look a likes, the general consensus was the mirrors are actually correct for 71-72 cutlass. And since the 70 correct mirrors seem to be a bit pricey atm, I was gonna live with them for a while. I still got an eye out for a set.

Originally Posted by marcar1993

I had a lawn chair in my cutlass too when I had the interior out.

Hot pink! Dude, I wish I could be that cool. We should start a club.

Originally Posted by Jamesbo

That's the tricky part where the rear quarter attaches to the bottom of the trunk.

Yep that sounds like my luck

[Coltonis]

Current status of the interior: More crack than a detroit drug dealer







See the shiny new ignition cylinder, it only took 6 hours of drilling with a power drill and titanium nitride drill bit... I lost the key Looking back, I probably should have tried to pick it since I'm pretty good at it, ( shhhhhhh ) but I was impatient that day and went straight for the powertools. Didn't scratch it up too bad considering that steering column metal is moosh compared to tool steel and the hardened lock cylinder.


Actually the dash pad is not bad at all, one big crack here on the driver side and then a bit of cracking around the light switch. Perfectly "usuable" - though I will probably replace it down the road.



I foresee rally gauges in my future - if I ever cough up the dough, that is


97,000? oh sure, I believe it... 197,000 is probably more like it


Dare I say, more critical than even cup holders - if there is one thing essential for every Arizona car its A/C! Thats cute, it actually has options other than MAX, COOL, & HI... I wonder what they do...


Waaaait-WHAT THE DEUCE!? Something bad has happened here...I can feel it...


Oh WHEW! Evidently this car came with the rare Trunk-Mounted-Evaporator-Option


Mmmmmm... Hantavirus-ey...


Whats that you say? Small Divets in my Doors?


Why yes! However, I prefer to call them Acoustical Resonatory Cavities



And just look the door panels were modified accordingly...


With some form of cutting implement, that I can only surmise as being a rusty spork.


Honestly, I could *chew* a cleaner whole...

[Wasted]

Looks like someone let their 3 year old cut the holes in the door panels with a butter knife lol.

[Yellowstatue]

Before you vacuum that interior, I would look for the clock hands...they are missing...

[deadbiker]

atleast you will get to see the odometer roll over

[Rdrokit]

I hope you can keep your sense of humor once you dig deeper.

[citcapp]

Sometimes we wonder why we start these projects. Then we see a members finished car and become motivated again. At least thats how it works with me. Keep it going............

[Coltonis]

WOWSER!! Sure did let this one get away from me... I have made quite a bit of progress since my last post so i'll try to get this caught up. This is the last bunch of crusty baseline pictures I had:

(Thats a lie; I have more. I just want to hurry up and get to the progress pics)

This is the '78 rochester quadrajet carberetor that I rebuilt. The motor did actually run with it (though not "well" at all).


Apparently, Edward Scissor-hands "fixed" the wiring somewhere along the way


One advantage of having a 455 block outta a '73 car: First year the factory used HEI. Woot! (err...I think.)


We're loosing par'er Capt'n!... "Welp, THERE's your problem"


FYI: Fan Shrouds are important-- With out it, the fan will beat on the upper radiator hose like its a red-headed step child. Ask me how I know - I even have a shiny new one already.


"Oh, one of these things is not like the other. One of these things just doesn't belong"... lets see I got a big "E" over here...


...And, Suprise! A big fat ugly "J" over on this side.


Okay, now I'm a Techie type person by default, I have been known to design microprocessor circuits just for "fun". HOWEVER, I could not for the life of me figure out what this little electrical "Doo-Dad" was supposed to be accomplishing. While my spidey-sense is telling me its broken, I'm still scratching my head as to its purpose. Round one of Name-That-Part... Ding ding ding.



Stay tuned, more to come...

[Bluevista]

That's the horn relay/key reminder buzzer on my '71. It has no cover and is missing a few inside pieces-parts but I'm pretty sure that's it.
That wiring is scary.

[Lady72nRob71]

Originally Posted by Bluevista

That's the horn relay/key reminder buzzer on my '71. It has no cover and is missing a few inside pieces-parts but I'm pretty sure that's it.
That wiring is scary.

You won the prize - that is the skeleton of the horn relay. The PO prolly got tired of the buzzer and gutted it (including the coil!) . Later, it was a good wire splicing / fire initiating device...

[66ninetyeightls]

Keep going. I wanna see a video of that thing firing up.

[svnt442]

Originally Posted by Coltonis

HEI didn't first appear until 1974. And you have points style male wires on your HEI cap. That's a no no. I guarantee you are not getting a good connection because of that.

That harness looks to be quite the mess. And yes that is the horn relay on the fender. There are a couple connectors that plug into the bottom of it and some wires that attach on the post.

Try and get your hands on another E head for sure. You want to even out the engine. Miss matched heads will work in a pinch, but I wouldn't leave it that way.

[Coltonis]

Cool, horn relay/key buzzer -- err 1,000 points to Bluevista (since he was first)

Originally Posted by svnt442

And you have points style male wires on your HEI cap. That's a no no. I guarantee you are not getting a good connection because of that.

LOL, Yeeeah, about that, see I can only have somebody give me a blank stare from across a parts counter for so long... (after trying to explain the difference between the HEI wires I wanted and what his computer was saying are the correct wires) before I say "Screw it, I'll make it work."

And don't worry pretty much everything you guys see in these pictures is either gonna be redone, repaired, or replaced.

[svnt442]

If you still have the wires you pulled off the car you can swap the ends over to the new ones. You just need a pair of needle nose pliers, a razor blade, some sort of lube (I use spray white lithium grease) and a crimping tool.

Also when you do get this thing started set the initial timing to 20° BTDC (before top dead center) with the vacuum advance disconnected and plugged. It's different with an HEI vs a points distributor.

[delmontcrusier]

Looks like a nice fixerupper/project I will see about getting some pic's of my new project tommarow.I am worse off than you on this new one though.She be a a gutted shell mateyThe body is fairly decent as it is from Az but is missing alot.

[Coltonis]

Okay so I think these progress pics are actually all the way back from
March

Basically I figured the engine was as good a place as any to start . After a long stint of collecting the bare essentials for yoinking out the engine. I called my friend over to help (if you see a shadowy figure with very little hair lurking in the background of any pictures thats him, no need for alarm, LOL). I have been helping him deck out his 66 Polara with all kinds of gadgetry so I called in some favors.

After much debate an extensive searching for something better I ended up getting a 2 ton engine hoist from Harbor Freight.


Chineseium scares me, but I went for it mostly for the simple fact that they mis-priced it and I was tired of looking.


Also got a matching engine stand rated for 1000lbs.


First thing pulled was the battery,after all this would be the point in time where something might actually start "working", since we didn't want it to.


Losing the hood provides some vertical space for yoinking.


Plus, you don't whack your head on the hood tooth every time you stand up. Mine was already a little beat up so my storage procedure is prolly less than "Ideal".


The semi-nice quadrajet came off so that it didn't get thrashed. It was replaced with this Engine Lift plate mostly to keep crap from getting in the engine (not that it really mattered anymore). Keep in mind it claims to hold 1000lbs, though I would never put any body part I wanted to keep underneath a thousand pounds dangling from one of these, the general consensus online was that they work quite well.


I had filled the coolant back when I was attempting to get it running so we had to drain all of that out again. We may have missed the pail just a tad.


Radiator Hoses came off once it was just a trickle. Check out the horror inside that thermostat housing... also disconnected and plugged fuel lines.


The radiator came out no prob, makes it a little more roomy for working/pulling. Though I found my radiator mounts are bugered up a little too.


I had pulled the alterator earlier for some reason (I forget why) but left the one bracket still attached so that came off.


My friend wrestling with the fan bolts


The exemplary standards of half-assery that are found throughout this car are evident in the fan bolt selection.


An extraordinarily filthy power steering pump was then unbolted and just propped to the side


We have lift off! Jacked up the car as far is it would go... And now say it with me people... JACK STANDS!


I just thought this was a cool view of the cutlass


Exhaust manifolds were the next parts to come off. My friend said we could try pulling the enigine with them on but it was just easier to take them off before so that they didn't catch on anything. Once again we were apalled by the hodge-podge selection of threaded hardware holding this stuff together.


We just left the exhaust pipes dangle, which may not be the best for them but hey they're ugly so worst I'll have to do is get/make new ones.

Our plan (at this point) was to get the tranny and engine all at once. So I started draining the TH400. Oh and Automatic Transmission fluid does NOT taste good. Ask me how I know...


The last bit we were able to accomplish that night was disconnecting the drive shaft. For never having removed a driveshaft before I was suprised at how little is actually holding that thing together... Two U-bolts on the differential, thats a grand total of four nuts.


Around that point it was getting late and we were promising to come back and finish up the next afternoon, as a result it sat for nearly a month... doh!

[Coltonis]

Originally Posted by svnt442

Also when you do get this thing started set the initial timing to 20° BTDC (before top dead center) with the vacuum advance disconnected and plugged. It's different with an HEI vs a points distributor.

I'm curious... Does that cure/prevent some symptom? Or, are you just saying to use that as a starting point for setting the timing?

Originally Posted by delmontcrusier

She be a a gutted shell matey

LOL, Excellent! b sure to take lots of pictures. I didn't think to start taking pictures till after I had mine home and I regret it already.

[svnt442]

That's the starting point for the timing. The stock HEI does not have as much mechanical advance built in so you need to bump up the initial to get the amount of total timing needed.

Also it looks like you have a Toronado engine. That big thing bolted to the front of the engine behind the balancer is a front engine mount.

Once you have it out check the machined pad below the E on the passenger side at get a good pic of it. There will be some numbers and a letter stamped there.

[delmontcrusier]

o well I do have a few before I got the car pic's taken by the previous owner but I will show them along with the rest once I start the thread.On second thought I have alreaddy shown most of them so here they are.

[delmontcrusier]

Originally Posted by svnt442

That's the starting point for the timing. The stock HEI does not have as much mechanical advance built in so you need to bump up the initial to get the amount of total timing needed.

Also it looks like you have a Toronado engine. That big thing bolted to the front of the engine behind the balancer is a front engine mount.

Once you have it out check the machined pad below the E on the passenger side at get a good pic of it. There will be some numbers and a letter stamped there.

hmmm I know of a 67 toro missing a engine

[svnt442]

Originally Posted by delmontcrusier

hmmm I know of a 67 toro missing a engine

Well if it's a 425 hiding under those E and J heads it's a possability, but otherwise I doubt it.

[Coltonis]

Hmm... If its a Toro engine, I'm gonna feel dumb that I didn't catch something like that back when I was originally decoding all the Serials...

Before I even bought it I had looked at the castings. The block is cast with 398021 FA above the water pump. So a 455 no earlier than 72. ( upto 76, I think.)

I had decoded the stamp pad and got that it was an Oldsmobile block from 73. Though I forget what the rest of it meant atm, I just double checked and its got the small drill spot top left corner and its stamped with:
33M718708

Anyone care to double check my math on this?

Is there a tell-tale for Tornado engine? Only thing I knew of that differentiated them was the Oil pan...

[citcapp]

The front motor mount plate is a dead give away. When you pull the heads the E head should have big valves. You will want to find another big valve E head to replace the J smog head.

[svnt442]

That is a 73 engine so the E is the replacement, not the J. So there is no way to know if the E is a big valve head until you pull it.
There will be nothing in the codes to tell you it's a toro engine.

[Coltonis]

Well if that engine mount is the only other way to tell I guess I don't feel all that stupid. LOL, I just checked out what a 1973 Toronado looks like, fricking HUGE, that car is prolly a mile long. Okay, well cool

Now I've noticed you guys seem to be almost as upset about the mismatched heads as I was, but no need to fret as I think I've already got my bases covered in the engine head dept. I would like to present to the court exhibit "C"

There is a FedEx man somewhere out there getting company subsidized chiropractor visits because of me


Ta-Dah!


And look this set actually matches...



These are are verified large valve intakes - measured them to be 2.07"



I got these from this forum's very own 2blu442, nice guy, lots of cool parts. He even got them hot tanked, fluxed and checked the valve sizes for me b4 he shipped them. I highly recommend you send him your money, magnificent things will show up on your door step.

Originally I was debating whether I really "needed" the big valve C's or if I should just get an E to match the one I already had. I ended up getting them because they are supposed to be just as good as any other cast iron heads in stock form, but should I ever want to get them ported the potential for better performance will be available. Or atleast thats what I told myself

[AZ442]

I may have seen this car before. There was a classic car dealer in Prescott Valley that may of had this car 4 sale 8-9 years ago.